Love Languages

Offend in my radio program “Lovely Night”, lots of callers asked how do you know if he/she loves me or not? Well, the easiest way to know that is of course “just ask her/him”. However, young people especially women don’t dare to be so direct. Most of the time, my female friend would say “How can I go straight to ask him if he loves me? It would be so embarrassing”. Another male friend of mine experienced a time when he didn’t love her, but he has to say “Yes” because he doesn’t want to embarrass that girl who was directly asked him. He added that I don’t love her but she isn’t bad at all. Then he keeps the relationship moving ahead and hoping that he will love her one day. After a few months, he decided to tell her that he doesn’t love her and that he couldn’t be in this relationship anymore. They broke up. What do you think about that?

Back to a few years ago, I attended a discussion on “Love Languages”. They explained how people express their love to other.

1- Wording person: this is the direct one. Some types of people like to be straight forward. She/he uses sweet words to express their feeling toward their partner.

2- Gift person: this kind of people use gift as a tool of expression their love. Wherever they go, they will never forget to bring something back for the one they love. She/he used observation to buy her/his partner a gift. For example, by accident while walking together in a bookstore, she/he hears her/his partner said that “This book is so beautiful”. The next day, she/he will come back to the store and get that book for her/him.

3- Service provider: this type of person value serving. They like to serve their partner. For example, he/she visit someone’s home together with other friends. There is a beautiful lamp in the corner, and his/her partner say “this lamp is so beautiful. I have one at home but it doesn’t work”. So he/she would response “well would you like me to check it out for you, I may be able to fix it”. This type of person will always be there for him/her to make sure that his/her life is comfortable.

4- Touch person: These types of person like to express their feeling by being close to her/his partner. They like to hold hand while walking, they like to hug or kiss, and like to be around closely. In a country where tradition is concern, there are not many Touch persons.

5- Quality of time: for some people, spending time together is important. These kinds of people like to express their love by being around all the time. They may not able to help a lot, but they make sure that you are not alone and that you can also share with them your sadness. They like to share whatever moment with you no matter when you are happy or sad. And they like to have you with them.

There is a website that you can read it for more detail at www.fivelovelanguages.com , I never check it before, but it should be interesting, I guess.